Jacob Woods

Jacob Woods
Jacob is gay. He eats, breathes, and sleeps lgbtqia issues. He is a psychology major currrently working to educate the simpletons. He attends college in the Twin Cities.

Sunday, October 16

Roid Rage

Hemorrhoids are terrible little blood clots that form in the bottom of your anus. They are painful, scratchy, and they bleed after using the bathroom. Apparently, one of the causes of hemorrhoids is anal penetration. That and sitting for long periods of time. Being the gay intellectual I am is just asking for roid rage. I have the worse case of hemorrhoids and I haven't even had butt sex in forever. Just being plain and open about it.

I figure hey, there has to be a bunch of gay men who experience this and sometimes you just need someone to relate to. I like to be that guy. Anal penetration puts gay men at risk for this not because it is God's punishment, but because that is just how biology works. You put pressure on your veins, you get the chance to experience roid rage. I could see the radical right wing arguing, gay men have more hemorrhoids, it's a sign from God that you shouldn't have butt sex. Just like HIV/AIDS is a gay man's death sentence. Because you know, women can't get HIV or anything. (Nor can male teenagers who have a higher frequency of homosexual experiences! Sarcasms a whore.)

This God's punishment crap get's thrown around so blindly it pisses me off. When a pregnant woman gets hemorrhoids it isn't because God is punishing her for being pregnant. Nor is it God's punishment when a 50 year old man get's colon cancer. What did all of you people who aren't gay do in God's eyes to receive miserable conditions? Oh no, all of a sudden this was just "God's plan" for you to get ill and/or die.

It blows me away the crap people come up with to describe the world around them. Understand complexity and live simply. That's my new motto.


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